Saturday, August 19, 2006

8.19.06, Saturday Stasis

Saturday slow and static, with the first half day spent trying to catch some illusive sleep fantasy — the one that says it actually can be done, uninterrupted, all at one "sitting," then I moved out to the neighborhood, the 1500-calorie smoothy, more of Kuhl's book in a local cafe, small shopping. This cafe though, despite the fact that many coffee snobs extol its virtues tirelessly, the music is always inescapably bad, so today I was prepared with my "big" headphones, the kind that remind of the 70's or of radio show hosts sitting behind their consoles. The hips kids seem to love 'em. Me, headphones, and a bright orange book. The overcaffeinated and exuberant Russians, however, of course chose to sit right behind me, so I could enjoy the white noise even with headphones on.

There are marble countertops facing a new park and reservoir in my neighborhood. Trees, shade, shattered bits of light in the millions, walkers, grass, and a questionably successful fountain-structure which is the park's high point and resembles spitting-up as metaphor. Cal Anderson Park maybe? Many non-Seattlites don't realize that most of the city's parks and campus spaces, including Volunteer Park at the far northern end of my neighborhood, were layed out and designed by Frederick Law Olmstead, yes of Central Park, etc. so this new little park has steep competition. . . . why am I talking about this? It was my view today. Context and history.

Symptoms-wise, some nausea, a lot of fatigue, and mostly just trying to figure out where the pain is going; "up" has been the basic answer, still I need to jump a few steps ahead of it and make sure I keep it in check. While I do that I've got either Reservoir Dogs, not a theme, Cronenberg's Naked Lunch, or Melvin Van Peeble's 1971 Sweet Sweetback's Baadassss Song to choose from. (Comments from our lurking resident mister film expert filmophile?)

Replaced the coffee pot — does not fit. Refuse to see symbolism in this.

And now the daily number on the Franky Scale, a somewhat listless 6. Listless days are part of a normal life like the rest, so nothing that worries me much. If previous chemo schedules are any indication of how this new chemo schedule will go, then today should be the worst in terms of fatigue and nausea. Enjoy your Saturday, here's to the worst.

P.S. to Larry & Lefty, Apple has a new firmware update available today, which will help your laptop's fan work more efficiently and keep things cooler, DOWNLOAD IT! Don't hit the "Later" button; or if you already did that then go back to the menu under the apple icon, desktop far left, and click on "Software Update." A little reminder.

5 comments:

spacely said...

hey spot , did you get the package?! Kerry did next day air, so it should have been on your door step today. Hope you had a well "managed day". Always thinking of you. Did you look at the book ryan wanted you to have?! I'm not sure how he came by that book, but he thought of you and wanted you to have it. Loved the pictures .. frankie is supposed to send us copies right!? Frankie is one cool guy. He must be the best of friends and he has totally mastered the art of flirting especially with the "nade". Can't believe another week has passed by since we all saw you. Remember who loves you ;) me
P.S. fatten your little self up with the gorilla poop cookies. I think dayne might have snitched one!

Slarry said...

Saturday August 18, 2006

Hey Spot:

Thanks for the apple reminder. And I will do it-- I will, just as soon as I finish this
comment.

Today was La Grande First Open House. It went Ok. But, it got me off task
a little because we couldn’t be at home for 4-5 hours. More importantly,
neither could our THREE dogs. So, sorry for the late comment.

We did do something unusual today. Not so unusual for regular folks, but for
us it was a reminder of a life we use to live. We actually went to a friends home for
a BAR B Q. We actually got out of the house, ate normal food at a reasonable time
and relaxed. We also participated in a Karaokee Contest, complete with a microphone
and the words dispalyed on a televsion screen. It was so much fun, low key, with great
conversation and nice, nice people.

No chaos, just sheer freedom and very empathetic people. I wish you and Frank
could have been here for it. You would have enjoyed yourselves.

I started reading Kuhl’s book last night. Very helpfful and informative. I’m glad you finally found a book that is benefical and educational. The big point so far--- learning to really listen.

I promise I’ll keep on everbody’s back until they get their own or I will just by one for them.

I’m sorry about the nausea an the fatigue. I hope you are feling a little relief
by the time this reaches you. In the words of our new friend (thanks to the Frank!!), Triumph, The Insult Comic-Dog, “I want to just take that nausea and fatigue and...POOP on it!!”


All of our love, BIG, BIG LOVE
slarry (and lefty)

tossing salads said...

am giving the book to nade today. she cant find one and really wants to start it. she ordered one and ill let her start reading and then when she gets hers ill get mine back. as i told you before, ive enjoyed it emensily (sp) already. i know i do one thing, at least, that the man states. when im with my patients im touching them. letting them know that there not contagious and that i care. so that made me feel good. ill get better at listening. the thing i enjoyed and think most people miss is his statement of 'people who are dying are still living.' excellent statement. going to the gym in a moment. need to work off this complcentcy ive enjoyed since getting together with susan. feel the need to get back in shape. and drag her along for the ride. love you and hope that the nausua and fatigue are lessening today. so you can eat some good pho. love you brother.

Mr. Jones said...

thanks to all three of you, all for support, to the first for sending off the cookies, the last two for working to get the book. i hope you're also going to look at it space...? as before, i think it will help if the whole family does. also, dearest Tossing, i talked to mom and i'm sending her the book, she's unaware of the Amazon.com or Powells.com universe, which is very simple to me to get arranged. she'll get it this week, then you can get your library copy back.

thanks, love, live now, -Mr. J

P.S. "Illusion is a necessity of life for a sensate being." -Uncle Fred, Mom's favorite philosopher.

lefthandedhamsandwich said...

I've been away from the blog for a few days (multiple family visits and a lot of trips to the Seattle tourist sites I'd never seen myself) and you've probably already done the right thing, but I recommend seeing Sweet Sweetback's, if only because it has the greatest tagline in Hollywood history: "Rated X by an all-white jury." BTW, your blog is "officially banned in China." There's a chance that everything on Blogspot is blocked, but maybe at some point you've demonstrated some sympathy with the "splittist" Dalai Lama or you've demonstrated leftist sympathies that made the current Chinese government uncomfortable. Or maybe something in between. But in any case, it's a sign of distinction.