Tuesday, November 21, 2006

11.21.06, The Lost Comment

Franky Scale, held in suspension between 5 and 6, which feels like an improvement after the past many days. The acne/rash I've been dealing with seems to have subsided some in the past few days, but my face does still very much look a piece of modern art, a Pollock. Filled with physical traces of confusion and pressure and possibly some meaning if you stare hard enough.

One result of this is that I now look sick, visibly. This is relatively new. I looked thinner before but "great" according to most family and friends based on what they had expected after not seeing me for some time and knowing that inside me, at least, something is eating my body away. Now with this ocular proof I expect you'd be a little shaken up. This is to be expected.

Now, a lost comment. I approved a comment today, posted on the 19th by "anonymous" and it's quite enigmatic to me. It says something about "for someone who has spent a lot of time thinking about Pascals' wager, it's funny you don't apply the same thinking to your disposable income." Would Anonymous care to shed light on this for me? It's just odd, I'm still trying to piece it together. Did I post somethind financial? Was I musing on money recently? Hm. Now, too, I can't see what post of mine this was attached to. Have to search for it. Or if anyone else finds it, let me know.

OK, I found it, it's connected to the "5.23" post. I read it again. Is it a castigation? Just a prodding to think more carefully? Curious. Curious.


tossing salads said...

ah the nade is fighting scott. shes just so nice that even if its for her betterment, she still hates to fight. they have given her some of the red stuff in the iv to perk her up. she is longing to be with you. shes loves you beyond measure. anything you need or want well be an honor. looking forward to the princess also. rest, keep up the good fight. all my love.

Slarry said...

Hey Scott:
So, so excited to be with you again.
Can't wait until tomorrow!!! Plus,
we will be able to meet the lovely Ms. K. : )
Sorry I didn't write sooner---
Have been playing with Mom on the 7th floor.
Seriously-- she is waiting for you with great
anticipation. Seeing you will bring her such
peace and comfort.

Just like you do for me. You are very calming.
In honor of Thanksgiving-- let me just say
how grateful I am for you---
how grateful I am to be your sister.
You make me happy and you continue
to amaze me with your strength and attitude.

Have a safe flight.
And I will pray to cheebus for you to have less pain,
restful sleep and peace of mind.

Big love:
keep thinking about the movie
"Home For The Holidays"--
and "just float" -- just as Holly Hunter and Claire Daines
did while swimming in the ocean with all the fish.

( You can always escape to your bath tub ) : )
I love that movie!! And I adore you !!!

Love you--

Hey, what time to you get here anyway ???

spacely said...

It is so good to see the cute and sexy spot and kim, wish they could stay forever.I wish nade would get out of the hospital too. Isn't it great to finally see her turn it around. I don't know if it's the dr's are finally pulling their heads out of their butt or the best medicine ...which is the amazing spot! I think it's the latter. Love you love you love you,Spacely

mme x said...


now I am on the other side of the land mass, poking around in the blog to see how you do, but the blog is silent. no holiday fare. or none to share.

hope you are well. awaiting your return, mme x.

Anonymous said...

Hey Msr. Jones:
Sorry that I am using your blog comment space to get to you, but you are hard to reach. I know chemo has you in the dumps, so please, no apologies. I wrote to you earlier about a visit to you in Jan,but no answer....I can stay with a friend so you don't have to entertain me, just let me know if you are still in town in January...plus, send me a real address, I need to send a card and a gift...(for the non-denomenational winter holiday solstice)...love you much and Helena sends lots of hugs and kisses to you....

b o o said...

feel better

Slarry said...


Cancer affects so many of us. Too many. Is there anyone out there who hasn't been touched by this disease in some way? Who doesn't know someone who's fighting his or her own battle with cancer? What might be seen as success, as so many hits to the blog, so many responses sent in, is actually evidence of just how pervasive cancer has become. And that saddens me beyond words.
The same thing happens sometimes when I go up to Hopkins. On some days, you get there and the guards say the garage is full. And that's more than just an inconvenience. That means there are so many cancer patients in that day that there's no more room. What could be sadder?
I guess we could find some solace in the knowledge that we're not alone, that so many others are walking the same path. But that's little comfort; in fact, it's no comfort at all. I think this is all a sign that something has gone wrong. Far too many people are facing cancer. Somehow, some way, it has to be stopped. It just has to be.
-- Leroy Sievers

My Love to Mr. Jones, the bravest man
I know and the best brother. You are my gift.
You have touched so many.
I love you and hold you in my heart, always.

david said...

Hey. I bet I'm not the only one wondering where the posts are, hoping the journey east went well, and that you're just resting up a bit.